Chapter nineteen. Drew swam lazily across her pool, trying to muster the energy for her normal laps but it was just too damn hot

Drew swam lazily across her pool, trying to muster the energy for her normal laps but it was just too damn hot. She ducked her head under the water, enjoying the coolness of the springs, then surfacing again to glide slowly across die water.

She'd been halfway tempted to invite Jay to dinner, even if it was just grabbing a burger at Rhonda's, but she thought better of it. Instead, she'd ask her to lunch tomorrow. It would be safer than dinner. Dinner was too intimate a meal. Lunch, much more informal. Just two friends out for a quick bite. It would be quite innocent.

She nipped onto her back, lazily kicking her feet. If she wasn't careful, this little infatuation she had was going to end up consuming her. And if she had any sense, she'd stay away... far away. Her attraction to Jay was reaching levels she was unaccustomed to. Her desire to see Jay, be with her, talk to her, was becoming a force she had a hard time controlling. It was like this unseen energy, powerfully pulling at her, drawing her closer and closer, tightening its grip on her with each encounter.

And making her lose her sense of reality. Because the reality was, Jay was living with Katherine. They were together. They were a couple. For eight years, they'd been a couple. And the reality was that no matter what Drew did, they would still be a couple.

Because even if Jenna and Katherine had an affair—were already having an affair—Jay would never know. She would go on, being as unhappy as she was now, but living a lie with Katherine. And Drew wondered if she pushed the issue, if she kept seeing Jay, would Jay eventually give in to her desires? Would they have their own affair? No. Doubtful. She didn't think Jay was the type. No, they would see each other, flirting with their attraction, much like they did now, driving both of them crazy with it until eventually it had to stop. Jay would pull away, they would drift apart, and their brief friendship would eventually fade.

What a waste.

Drew slipped under the water, her arms and legs moving as they glided under the surface, hands brushing the smooth stones on the bottom as she raced across the pool, trying to outrun her feelings. A waste, yes. Because when she was near Jay, when she looked into her eyes, she knew without a doubt that Jay was the one. The one with all the qualities she sought, the one who held her attention, who made her feel good, who made her heart race... the one she longed to touch, to kiss.

She finally surfaced, her lungs ready to burst as she sucked in fresh air. She stood in the water, trying to catch her breath.

She should have told Jenna no, she wouldn't be a part of their so-called foursome. What business was it of hers if Jenna and Katherine had an affair? She wasn't a knight in shining armor. No one expected her to be there should Jay fall, should she need picking up. But how could she, in good conscience, sit idly by, knowing that Jenna and Katherine were sneaking off to be together, leaving an unsuspecting Jay all alone? How could she do that?

" You're gonna get hurt, " she murmured. " She's going to break your heart."