Three Additional Options

Three additional components may be incorporated in a letter of condolence. These options are found frequently in the letters we have reviewed, but not as often as the seven basic components. Although they are seen less often, they have the potential to add rich, inspirational, and comforting dimensions to a letter of condolence.

1. Share your philosophy of life or provide a religious commentary.

Death almost always brings in its wake a renewed awareness and reawakening of our spiritual beliefs. If you choose to use references to religion in your letter of condolence, be sensitive to the religious orientation of the bereaved. It would be most unusual, however, to offend anyone by offering your prayers as a personal act of love. Discrepancies of religious belief matter little if your effort to console is an authentic one and your espousal of beliefs is not strongly contrary to those of the bereaved.

Obviously you should not use the occasion to try to convert the bereaved to a particular point of view, but feel free to express yourself in religious terms if these are the words that come to you naturally. All responses to the loss of a loved one raise the spiritual challenge of forgiving and accepting in a world that may not have met one's hopes and expectations.

2. Share your own grief experiences, but don't compare them with those of the bereaved.

If you have suffered the loss of a loved one, your insights may be very helpful to the bereaved. In sharing your bereavement remember that each loss is unique. Share the experience, but don't weigh or compare it with theirs. In our talks with bereaved persons, the well-intended phrase that most often angers is " I know (understand) exactly how you feel." The bereaved is not interested in a discourse on your suffering. They are likely, however, to be grateful for your intimate understanding of the pain of loss and may find inspiration in seeing how you have coped. For example, " When Bobby died, for months I thought my life was over. Then one morning, I saw the sun streaming through the kitchen window and I was, again, glad to be alive."

3. Include a quotation, reading, or historic letter.

On occasion the words of another may touch a sentiment that strikes a chord in your heart. By all means, use them! The purpose in writing a letter of condolence is to convey 1 your sympathy as authentically and caringly as possible. If a ' poet's words echo your own message, it is a gift.

It may seem surprising, but those in grief have also told us how inspiring and healing historic letters can be. Many of these historic letters nourish the spirit and have the potential to create a deeper realization of the universal nature of grief. Some of these letters touch our souls, lifting us out of unawareness and into awareness, out of pain and into gratitude. Although the letters have been written in the distant past, their expressions of sympathy may capture what you wish to convey.

Types and style of formal congratulations

A letter of congratulations, or congratulations letter, is used in both personal and business situations. Their primary purpose is to formally congratulate a person or an organization for an outstanding achievement.

These types of letters should be used with good judgement, only in situations for which they are truly warranted. Otherwise, they will lose their meaning.

Note: Certain types of congratulations letters are also be referred to as " commendation letters" in some situations.

Congratulations letters, or letters of congratulation, are written for a wide variety of business and personal situations. They should be short and to the point, but genuine, sincere, and believable. The opening sentence should state the reason for the congratulations, the second paragraph should elaborate briefly, as appropriate, followed by a short closing sentence.

Everyone likes to be noticed and recognized for their accomplishments. So there’s really no bad reason to send someone a congratulatory note. They can strengthen both personal and professional relationships, and there are a wide variety of occasions when they’re appropriate. Here’s just a sampling:

§ Personal: Weddings, engagements, birth/adoption of child, graduations, religious rites (bah mitzvah, confirmation, baptism, etc.), winning a sports competition/election, making it onto a team, college acceptance, new home

§ Professional: Promotion, award, retirement, new title, landing new contract or client, starting a new business

The big thing with sending a note of congratulations is to do it as soon as possible. You don’t want to congratulate someone on their new baby when the kid’s about to turn one. A well-timed congratulations gives a boost to the excitement someone is already feeling; a belated one is a mismatch with the person’s circumstances and thus falls flat.

A formal new job congratulations letter is a type of a letter which is written to a person to congratulate him on getting a new job. These types of letters are sent formally to colleagues, friends or any other person.